Can I Turn it Off?

Once I got insane to succeed, my mind flipped. All I could think about was achieving my goals. I went from a lazy prick to a maniacally driven crazy, baby real estate investor nut. All I could think about was buying another rental house. I ain’t kidding. Every morning I got up and all I could think about was buying another house. My mind was consumed. I was not going to be stopped.

I had read so many "no money down" books and listened to way too many real estate tapes. I believed what they said, "if what you can perceive and believe, you can achieve."

They said if you can keep going forward with real determination and tenacity, the world can’t stop you.

I actually believed that. I started buying a ton of little houses in Portland. That’s all I thought about. Someone said, "if you do for 2 years what other people won’t do, I’ll show you how to live the rest of your life like others can only dream of." Well, maybe more than two years, but it worked.

I knew it was true. Hell, no one could stop me. Every penny I made in architectural fees, I used to buy more rentals. Eventually I had 20 rentals but still lived in a shitty apartment and drove a crummy car. I was focused on just creating this passive income that would eventually allow me to play and not worry about bills. I wasn’t interested in money, I just didn’t want to be pinned down ever again. No God damn boring job for me.

I envied people who liked their job. I didn’t. I was bored shitless with architecture. I wanted to windsurf, ski, golf, horseback ride, clam dig, travel, and talk to my dog. Even if I could take my dog, ‘Max’, to work, he wouldn’t go. He wasn’t stupid. He wanted his master to be a trapper, hunting guide, fishing guide, pro surfer, or even a bum but not a boring architect. Max wanted to do things. Hell, dogs only live to 13 at the best. He didn’t have time to dick around.

Well, what’s the problem. The obsessive motivation and drive worked. By the age of 42, I had enough real estate to relax and enjoy, but there was a problem. I was still driven. It didn’t seem to want to turn off. I couldn’t relax. My mind just kept focusing on my investment strategies, all day long.

Now, I was crazy. A yoga instructor told me that, why am I so determined to retire early. At the rate I am going, she said I’ll end up being spoon-fed in a corner room by a large male nurse. More to come...